All Grown Up
What does it mean to be “all grown up”?
It’s a question I’ve found myself asking a lot recently, with graduation right around the corner and the looming pressure of deciding what to do with my life.
So let’s rewind.
Early years.
Playing with toys, having fun, and focusing only on the present. The good old days. Many of us can agree that having such simple pleasures without any understanding of the world around us was great when we were kids. I don’t even think I was conscious back then. But then comes the first bit of growth. Hardship. Whether that was not getting our way or dealing with a bully, we all had to overcome some kind of adversity as a child. That is where we begin to experience growth, knowledge, and understanding of how the world works. These are formative years, where the brain is taking in so much information all at once. So, a lot of our most deeply held beliefs begin to form at this age.
That brings us into tweenhood and early teenage years.
Otherwise known as middle school. Growing evolves during this time, with social norms and societal preferences forming. People are starting to figure out who they are, others are fighting back against the idea of maturing. This is the time to try out all the odd little things that many look back on and cringe at. However, I think that these are some of the most important years, as self-identification begins at this age. Not just that, but puberty begins around this time too, which, of course, creates a lot of drama. Because of that, though, kids learn coping skills to get through it, which they will be able to carry with them into their adult life.
And finally, your teenage years.
Academics, extracurriculars, and pressure to decide who you are and what you want to do with your life. For me, these have been some of the hardest, yet most nostalgic years. Trying to decide who I am and what I care about through college applications has been some of the most grueling self-introspection that I have ever done, but it’s also provided insight into the causes that I really care about; what I think I can devote myself to. And through, love, heartbreak, friendship, and tears, I’ve found that high school, and your life, is what you make it. I’ve watched kids curl themselves into a ball to please more people, or lash out to protect themselves. But through all of that, I’ve found that being nicer, even just a little bit, even when they don’t reciprocate, helps bring a little more peace into the world, even if you can’t see it.
That brings us back to the original question.
What does it mean to be “all grown up”?
The answer I’ve found is that we’re never really “all grown up”, but rather constantly changing and growing. You might have grown up differently than I did, have had different experiences or norms pressed upon you, or have been exposed to different concepts and ideas. And as I, and many others, take this next step, whether that be into the workforce, military, or college, I will be exposed to different cultures, concepts, and experiences which will allow me to grow further. And, as with any amount of growth, that is scary. It is scary to leave my home, my friends, my safe places. But no one is ever truly ready to do new things until it’s happening.
So, to my youngest self: laugh hard, long, and loud. Don’t let anyone soften your imagination and passion.
To my middle school self: Love all of your interests as hard as you can, and don’t feel embarrassed about what that is. Try new things, make mistakes.
And to my current self: Love yourself a little more each day and give yourself space to breathe. You have more than enough time, even if you don’t think so.
And that goes to whoever is reading this too. Never let anyone take away your joy or spark because that is what tethers you to yourself, at the end of the day. It may seem like too much sometimes but take everything one day at a time and trust that it’ll work out the way it’s supposed to.
